Sunday's not the day...bummer!

So from now on, I won't post anything on this damn blog until it has happened! He's not coming home tomorrow. Friday afternoon, after we had our monitor training, the boy (Aaron that is) decided that he would scare the crap out of me and have a big blue spell. His heart rate dropped and he was BLUE and his oxygen saturation was 32 at its lowest. I grabbed him and he didn't have any milk he was refluxing or spitting up, but had a nice sized boogie in his nostril. After suctioning him and relieving him of two large plugs in his nose, he was pink and SCREAMING. Talking to the doctor today, it was decided that if he had been struggling to breathe or telling us in some way (other than turning blue) that his nose was plugged, they would send him home. But his apparent shut down in response to such a stress shows that he's still too immature to go home. They are more comfortable because I am a preemie nurse, but I asked them to treat me like I was Joe Schmo off the street. They don't really want him home yet. So he stays. I was bummed because I miss him like crazy and it's so hard to be pulled between him and charlie. But I know he's in the safest place, I know they take great care of him, and I know that in the grand scheme of things, the past two weeks will be a mere blur in ten years. SO I spent all day with him, feeding him and changing him, letting him sleep and getting some cuddle time in. We are also giving him preemie formula every other feed because he's not gaining great weight. breast milk is best, but preemie formula has more calories...so he's getting 50/50. I'm not nursing him right now because every time I do, he loses weight, even if it's only once a day. We'll work on the real deal when he's home and bigger and more vigorous. I hate pumping (especially in the middle of the night) but I will do anything for this little guy...plus it prepares me for broken sleep once he's home!

Charlie had a great day with Alex today. They went to the zoo with friends of ours this morning and then to his cousin Ethan's birthday party this afternoon. He will be one tired little guy when he gets home! Hope everyone out there is well!